Log in

No account? Create an account
23 April 2006 @ 10:51 am
Ain't leavin'  
Title: Ain't leavin'
Timeline:Post OIS, the BDM didn't happen
Warning: Character death
Comments:Written for the Shakespeare Quote challenge. Quote Men of few words are the best men

“Ain’t leavin’.”

The words echo from the bulkheads, tough and strong. You think you’re as crazy as River used to be. Hearing voices, wandering through an empty shell of a ship, but its here that you’re most comfortable, and most at peace. It’s always been so.

‘Cause its where he is, where all your memories are, the sweet and the bittersweet.

Mostly bittersweet since finding them bleeding. Jayne lying stubbornly on top of River, hand holding his shirt against the wound his life blood pumping out onto the ground.

The memory of tears running down your face, trying to pull him back to you. Blue eyes looking up at you steadily a promise in his voice, “ain’t leavin’ ya Kaylee, not really.”

Standing at the graveside hardly able to stand and the Shepherd’s saying something ‘bout him being a man of few words but great actions. You think he’d probably scoff at that. Her man never could see that he could be good.

You want to fall on your knees and beg him to come back, but the steady, strong warmth behind you won’t let you go.

Ain’t leavin’.” It’s a whisper only you can hear.

You want to hate River, ‘cause she was there. But you can’t, so you put your arms round her as she cries, comforting her, reassuring her, it weren’t her fault. ‘Cause the zhu tou man wouldn’t have left her. He’d finally realised they were all family and that was what he was good at; protecting family.

Not yourself for a long time, the thing you wanted most in the world gone, you want to do nothing more than to die and be with him. But you can feel big hands on your shoulders as you’re shook gently ‘n’ a voice growls, ain’t leavin’.”

And you don’t.

‘Cause there’s babies to think ‘bout now. The doc says there’s gonna be twins and you grin, the man never did do anything by halves.

Simon wants to step up but you tell him no. The best man for you has come and gone and you don’t want another.

The babies are coming and you're so scared, but he’s there, you know it. Watching, giving you strength. Even Simon felt it, though he would never admit it, glancing over his shoulder now ‘n’ then, waiting to get hit in the face for hurting you.

Two boys lay at your breast and you hope he can see them. You think probably they’re gonna be a lot like him and hear a laugh; ”ain’t leavin’.”

After awhile you needs come back, and knowing that he, of all people would understand, you go back to being the old Kaylee with a fella in every port. You have to be more discreet now though, ‘cause of the children and you never bring ‘em back to Serenity, no way could you hurt him that way.

It’s more fun anyway to retire to their bunk, battery powered enjoyment in your hand, knowing that somehow he’s there, watching ya...moaning. Ain’t leavin’.”

You watch as the years go by, the boys growing, turning out just like their pa, ornery, stubborn, loving and swai.

The Captain jokes they got more brain power though and you punch him in the arm. You have the last laugh when Josh up ‘n’ marries Christy, and you tell Mal that now he’s gonna have Cobb grandbabies.

Though Serenity’s grounded now, you have to keep coming back, can’t just leave him there on his own. Understanding they always bring you, standing by while you wander round, remembering.

Today you can almost see him, leaning against the bulkhead, thumb tucked in his belt fingers resting on his gun.

“It’s time.” His voice is a comforting growl and you hold out you hand. His surrounds yours safe ‘n’ secure, just like old times

You look round at the boat, dusty now, but still welcoming, sweet memories flooding through your brain. You turn and walk away.

“We’re leavin’.”

Zhu tou = pig headed
Current Mood: ditzyditzy
matchlightfirematchlightfire on April 24th, 2006 01:20 am (UTC)
seriously, book...you're killing me with this stuff...
[sniffles] just...so...gorram BEAUTIFUL!
I'm sorry.  That was mean.: FF - Jayne Ouch (nazgul icons)cheshire_monkey on April 26th, 2006 05:05 am (UTC)
*sniff* I thought I had commented on this fic. I'm not surprised I didn't - it's hard to see the computer screen through the watery eyes.

That was heartbreaking, but beautiful. The idea of telling Mal about Cobb grandbabies - that was a nice touch.

Thank you for reminding me to come back and re-read. *hugs*
ceslasceslas on July 6th, 2006 05:07 am (UTC)
Oh wow...That does make the tears come don't it? Sniffling, seriously- and I don't do that often, not my way usually...but this one really has power.
Today ya can almost see him, leanin’ against the bulkhead, thumb tucked in his belt fingers restin’ on his gun. I can see that perfectly, it is the epitome of Jayne. Memories this one....
bookaddict43: want youbookaddict43 on July 6th, 2006 08:19 am (UTC)
You put it in your memories? Thank you. I loved this one!
ceslasceslas on August 29th, 2006 05:17 am (UTC)
And this time I cry, for truth. For Jayne having to wait for Kaylee, for Kaylee having to do it with only his memory, for the life they didn't get to share...
confidentiality spice: dark phoenixdanniisupernova on August 22nd, 2006 05:10 am (UTC)
I'm tempted to cry...but I can't. Very nice, very creative. (i'm still fried tho)
The Heartbeat of Debauchery: bloody hellladytalon1 on February 11th, 2007 06:10 pm (UTC)
*sniffles* That was so sad, and sweet at the same time. I had to break off mid-sniff to LOL at the Cobb grandkids, though - I can just imagine the look on Mal's face!!!
bookaddict43: Hoopball buddiesbookaddict43 on February 12th, 2007 01:35 pm (UTC)
Serve Mal right for the brains comment!! I'm so glad you liked it...
(Deleted comment)
bookaddict43: want youbookaddict43 on March 31st, 2007 03:51 am (UTC)
I have worked it out! That you liked it I mean :)

This was one of my all-time favourites that I've written. It makes me happy that people still remember and read it! Thank you for telling me...
Sophie: Kayleesophie10 on October 28th, 2007 06:59 pm (UTC)
"ain’t leavin’ ya Kaylee, not really.”

I have tears running down my cheeks. It's what he would say.
bookaddict43: notalwayshappybookaddict43 on October 29th, 2007 11:20 am (UTC)
I figured Jayne would be stubborn even in death. I cried when I wrote this - thank you for the compliment of doing the same and for commenting :D
Jen: big hugjayneslilsis on March 14th, 2008 04:38 pm (UTC)
OMG, that was beautiful! You're making me cry at work, and I'm gonna get caught goofin' off.

*shifty eyes* I don't think anyone saw me...

Seriously, great writing!
bookaddict43: spooningbookaddict43 on March 15th, 2008 01:40 pm (UTC)
awwwwwww Sorry I made you cry *hugs*. Though that was my aim with this fic since I cried when I wrote it. I hope no-one caught you, but I'm glad you read and liked my story! *dances*
I will call her George: Jaynestrangevisitor7 on July 2nd, 2009 02:24 pm (UTC)
That was beautiful and I have tears in my eyes.
bookaddict43: notalwayshappybookaddict43 on July 7th, 2009 11:44 am (UTC)
It was always one of my favourites - I'm so glad you liked it.
mazokutenshimazokutenshi on March 31st, 2010 03:17 pm (UTC)
So sweet, and wonderful, and painfully bittersweet. Ya' made me cry...
bookaddict43: notalwayshappybookaddict43 on April 1st, 2010 01:06 pm (UTC)
Sorry I made you cry *hugs*. But glad you liked it :D
Sasssashajwolf on January 11th, 2012 07:55 pm (UTC)
This is lovely! You've captured Kaylee's voice beautifully - and yes, Jayne does seem like he would be stubborn enough for this.
bookaddict43: layouticonbookaddict43 on January 11th, 2012 09:03 pm (UTC)
Thank you! Jayne always struck me as incredibly stubborn :D